Thursday, 4 August 2011

Tips on surviving the apocalypse (aka the recession)

The present day graduate must be bulletproof. Fully, 100% bulletproof. When the local job centre looks like the student union, you know something is terribly awry. It is incredibly easy for him or her to lapse into a trough of despair; a journey downwards that is further facilitated by his or her inclination to follow any sort of press - be it tabloid or broadsheet. Tales of forty thousand applicants for one graduate job circulate freely, almost as if the act of gaining a position had become established as a Myth. Yes, myth with a capital 'M'.

Not I said the tinman, not I! For this bleak landscape of nothingness becomes the canvas upon which to shine. Let others keel over and perish while your wiliness grants you access to unforeseen prospects. Let the CV's of the others be printed on the finest of papers! Give the masters something of luxury to wipe their tired anuses with!

Nepotism, my friends, is alive and kicking. Do not be fooled that your CV will be read or even used as anal fodder. Permeate the inner core of your masters social circle and be at one with it. Do not be fooled that nepotism is necessarily a force of evil. Do not bask in the comfort of a depressed 'Send' button upon application. Do not suffer the ubiquitous rhetoric upon a follow-up call. Do not consider yourself to be the best for you are not.

Strategy and tactic.



The battlefield



The fauna



The construction

Sunday, 31 July 2011

And the beat goes on

A summary of the past nine months:

- Met a delightful young lady and been going out for over a year now. She's dangerously good at climbing and has fingers that rival Gaskins. Get good now dear but not too good...

- Lost the contents of my world (not said in screaming scouse girl voice) aka shitdrive. Stayed awake for 4 days at the peak encountering chest pains and hallucinating heavily. A phonecall to Mr Donnelly reassured me it was pleural chest pain and not heart pain. Fought on through, redrew as much of a years work as possible. It came off and a 2.1 was sent my way. A torturous shame thinking what would have been otherwise but I live to tell a tale (albeit a boring one).

- Went to the cave after 6 months of no physical exercise and got to the last moves of RA. Wondered why climbing is so odd and the body even more so. Hit training and climbing hardish and gains started to come back. Not climbed last two weeks since getting back on project. This is to be the year to do that (inevitably at a grade of Fb 4 no doubt).

- Sea fishing passion of old has come back. Went through my old stuff from 12 years ago and made lots of new rigs today. Caught some mackerel unexpectedly the other night. Was unusually tasty. I wonder how long it takes fish to get from the sea to Tesco?

Climbing tomorrow. Lovely. Big love.